Secret

Have been quite unhappy over home matters over this week . And hell its exam and i have no idea why am i jeopardizing my happiness and affecting my "exam" mood . Hmm , i admit i USED to be a rather negative person . Insecurities . Flaws . Grades . Friends . Relationships .
In short , i really wasnt a happy me . And i was losing a integral part of myself .
BUT .
I have learned that i should be in control of my happiness . No one can make you feel unhappy / dejected / upset UNLESS you allow them to . Happiness does not take a lot of hard work , but it definitely needs to be worked on .
So , what was i actually unhappy about in the past ?
Okay to be honest , i was really conscious about my weights and looks years ago . I used to be overweight since young .. Till secondary school . And that was then i really hate teasings . I cried a lot during those period too hahaha . But eventually , i managed to snap out of it . *TWISTS*

And indeed , i guess i really felt better . At least i felt pleasant about myself . Initially , i started to pen down my thoughts in a diary . I started running . Running really allows me to clear my mind , giving me fresh air and fortitude . I felt invigorated and much healthier . Things became to change for me . No commitments to plans . But a commitment to self .
And i recently came across this > "If you think you are fat , you are and you will act accordingly ."
I guess its really true . See , its a mind and psychology thing , your thoughts lead to actions and reality .
Losing weight is definitely not a easy task . ITS NOT EASY . Not easy without jabs , surgery , drugs . And its not a miracle thing . Hopes without actions wont make you a thinner person overnight . Its more like a mental game. A test of endurance of your willpower and perseverance .  And below is what i've read , and i found it impressive .
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"I employed The Secret to lose weight , putting into universe that i was attracting better health . I told the universe ' I continue to attract my optimum weight , Whatever weight that is , that's what i am attracting . The best weight for my body ' Then i started envisioning my thin self . I thought up of slogans , mantra and Jeri-isms like "Food is not my friend . Food is not my comforter , nor it is my confidante .It does not sing to me or give my wisdom . It is just food . AND IM MORE POWERFUL THAN FOOD " "
- Jeri Chrysong
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How inspiring is that ? Hahaha . A quote from an essay given by my tuition teacher .

And i would really like to try this out . And im confident that i will succeed in losing maybe some weight . I look back at my old photos now and im glad that i make it happen . Im glad that im out of it .