Gonna keep this post short because i am really tired now but i am too zealous to update this space of mine . I really have so much to say but i cant afford to blog every day of course . In fact i actually have a lot of uncompleted entries and topics on my phone which i typed out whenever i am free . Why do i have so much to say ? Hahaha .
"The main obstacle to success is the lack of determination " Its relevant .
I am actually ....... disappointed in myself . I know i may not have the right to be upset and angry but i just cant suppress all these . I am still not fully recovered . Why ...... I have done all that i can and all that i should . I am really following very strict diets and daily plans just to ensure i am on the right track , and nearer to recovery . Apparently i am still far from it . And what pisses me off is i dont even know what's the freaking problem with me . I guess i have to report again . FML yes i know i have to be patient . Its during times like this when my endurance and resilience is tested . Yes there are people who are worst than me . I wont give up .
"Dreams are just dreams . Goals are dreams with a plan and deadline " - Harvey Mackay
Honestly , i still dont know where i want to go . It might sound really ridiculous because i am taking my major exams in 52 more days and i am still unsure of where i want to go . To be frank , this annoying issue didn't really bothered me until this wednesday . I was writing an essay about worries and hopes for my future . And without me realising i was actually writing about all the negative aspects of future . Eg . High cost of living and environmental degradation . I thought i was actuallly dumb to talk about all this when i am currently uncertain about my near future - tertiary education .
I am still struggling to be confident enough to muster my courage to think about JC route . I have my worries and uncertainties too . On the other note , its really hard not to be influenced by my friends' choices . That's why i am having a hard time now .
If i were to say i am in for the Poly route , it would be even more hilarious because i simply have no idea which course i am interested in .
Yes dilemmas and struggles are parts of life !
Talking about career , i really did explore some possibilities , along with aspirations .
When i was young i wanted to be a teacher . Then i felt it was too boring because everyone at that age wanted to be an educator ! Now i realise it isin't an easy job . Teachers are role models . Teaching is about commitment and passion . Taking up the role as an educator , you are actually respected and valued in the society because of your responsibilities and duties . It is about imparting knowledge , nurturing the young and inculcating moral values in students. Not everyone can be a teacher , and not every teacher can be a good educator . Teachers' actions and attitude have direct influences and impacts on the students . And they have to be accountable for their behavior . Frankly , seeing and experiencing how my generation treat teachers really makes me feel that i am unsuitable for this job . For me , its rather daunting because i can never ever imagine what the next generation is gonna be like .
Then i wanted to be a doctor . Because i was told that i would not have to worry about the #firstworldproblem --- money . Yes , its always associated to doctors' income whenever this profession is mentioned . Actually i wanted to be a cosmetic surgeon . But i am really bad at drawing/sketching and performing practical skills . And doctors carry huge responsibilties too . Perhaps i might end up jeopardizing my reputation if something goes wrong . However , entering the health sector is still considered a good choice .
Okay i am really tired now and probably i should end here . Its teachers' day today and i am truly thankful that i have great teachers !